RANK EVERYTHING: Peruse my Picks (Pretty Please)

I’m not sure how this came up, but for some reason Dragon and I started listing the best of the Double P names. Before long we had enough for a good and bad list, and here you go:

Honorable Mention: Paula Poundstone – I enjoy her comedy, but the cloud with the child abuse scandal is hard to ignore. My understanding is she was cleared, but until I know the whole story I can’t put her in any category.

Top Five Bad “PPs”

#5 Peter Pettigrew and Pansy Parkinson – One wonders if ol’ J.K. had a run in with a P.P.

#4 Pontius Pilate – One could argue that without him you’d all be going to hell, but I mostly object to his O/C complex about hygiene

#3 Peter Peter (Pumpkin Eater) – Anyone else think his name is a sly metaphor? Well, regardless, it’s just another case of the Man trying to keep womenfolk down. Or in this case, in. Plus, now I have that stupid piano song stuck in my head. (And if you’re still not sure, check this out.)

#2 Pied Piper – I plan to write an entire story about this dude one day. He just gives me the creeps.

#1 Pol Pot – Sure he killed millions of his own people and gave “red” a bad name, but he takes a nice B/W photo, eh?

Top Ten Good “PPs”

#10 Power Puff (Girls) – I know nothing about them except that it’s a good way to talk to ten year old girls (at least according to Koz)

#9 Piper Perabo – I’ve liked her since COYOTE WILD (and you should have seen some of the choices on Google Images for her. Yowza.)

#8 Pink Panther – He don’t talk much, but he sells a mean piece of insulation.

#7 Peter Parker – To this day it upsets me that no one has made a “he flicks his wrist and white goo appears” joke.

#6 Parker Posey – For a while in the ‘90s it was the law that you couldn’t make an independent film without her. I’m in favor of that.

#5 Peter Piper – Dancing peppers….maybe they are “magic” peppers, if you know what I mean.

#4 Pablo Picasso – I was going to put him in the “bad” list for be a legendary “user” of women, but then I remembered chicks like that.

#3 Peppermint Patty – Does anyone else think Marcy was gay for her? Nonetheless, I liked this broad. I’d like to see her pop up randomly on other cartoons without a hint of explanation.