RANK EVERYTHING: Thanksgiving Words

For my Thanksgiving column this year I wanted to do something a bit different. Taking a cue from last week, I took the letters T-H-A-N-K-S-G-I-V-I-N-G and tried to come up with as many words from those letters that I was thankful for. Feel free to use these words during the Thanksgiving meal with friends and family. Have them play a game and you'll look the best. (But you better have someone else suggest the game, or it will look rigged.)

Laureate and Dragon helped me and there were a few words I'm just not that thankful for, like HAVING, TAG, VIG, SHAG, SAVING, THIN, STINK, SINK, VAT, NAG, HAG, ANT, AINT, GAIN, VAIN, SING, GNAT, SHIN, GAIN, ASKING, KNITS, KIN, VAIN, SING.

The rest I am much thankful for, and hopefully you will be too. (Some are videos, and I hope you take the time to watch. You can't imagine how much work it took to get this thing ready.)

THE TOP THIRTY THINGS I AM THANKFUL FOR THAT I GOT OUT OF THANKSGIVING

#30 Hanging (Ten) – You wouldn't believe it, but I'm quite the Surf Hound

#29 Gin (Rummy) – I don't mean to brag, but I am the world's greatest Gin Rummy player. Ever.

#28 Kang – Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos. (For another incredible Kang check out Alita Kang at www.alita-kang.com Ai mommi!

#27 Stag – You should have seen the video I was going to run here. Instead, you can look at the nice deer about to get eaten by wolves. (Actually, that was pretty close to the stag party video.)

#26 G- Thang – Look how skinny Snoop looks here!

#25 Gang – Not the Crips, not the Bloods, not even the Jets or the Sharks. The greatest gang ever? The Get Along Gang, of course!

#24 Saint/Sin – Perhaps the most famous sinner turned saint there is. Uttered the immortal words, “Lord, grant me chastity and continence, but not yet.”

#23 Nat (King Cole) – The man can sing. His daughter? A leech, but papa's the Man.

#22 Ving (Rhames) – I'm not allowed to post the video I want, but let's just say the word “Medieval” comes up

#21 Ink – I will never get over my love affair with pens (and if you'd like to buy me this one, or any Fisher Space Pen, I will show you my own ball point. Wait, that's too suggestive. Um, if you want to buy me a Fisher Space Pen I will squirt my ink all over...that's no good either. I'll be very happy)

#20 Thing – He's not just “Orange Hulk,” but has his own feelings of rage!

#19 Kant – I find “Critique of Pure Reason” a bit dry, but you'd by hard-pressed to find a better argued philosophical treatise ever. (EVER!)

#18 Tank – Goes down as one of the Top Ten Military advances of all time.

#17 Sting – Did you know Sting got his name for an outfit he used to wear that looked like a bumblebee?

#16 Night – 'Cause as far as Hyperion's concerned, the night time is the right time!

#15 King – I would love to have this dude at parties.

#14 Hat – Life is just so much better with a cool black hat.

#13 Viking – These guys don't get enough credit. They are basically less gay pirates. (They raped looted and pillaged just like pirates, but they couldn't stand to be away from women that long so they stayed close to shore.) You'll also notice I am not depicting a Viking with horns, as only an idiot thinks actual Vikings had horns. In case you are one of those idiots, think a minute and see if the reason doesn't come to you.