Izzy's favorite countries

[Last night at Dennys I sat down with one of my favorite people, Izzy to do a top ten list. Sadly, it didn't go quite as planned, but luckily I wrote down everything she said, so it worked out. We were supposed to do her top TEN favorite countries, but as you can see.....]

#8 Sweden

Hyperion: Why?

Izzy: 'Cause everyone is beautiful there

Hyperion: Even the men?

Izzy: Especially the men

#7 Sri Lanka

Izzy: It has a cool name, and has a line on the flag...I think (see for yourself)

#6 America

Hyperion: I'm shocked. Why?

Izzy: Because they have good movies and everyone else hates them

Hyperion: What's next?

Izzy: I don't know. There's not that many countries I actually like. You're going to have to make this a top five list instead of a top ten. [Editor's Note: We tried very hard to get to 10, but Izzy just couldn't do it.]

#5 England

Izzy: Because they have bangers and mash, and bad teeth.

Hyperion: I'm trying to think of a "Bangers" joke, but nothing's coming to me.

Izzy: I'm actually British. I was born there. I lived there for ten years.

#4 Australia

Izzy: Because they have all the cute animals, like Dingoes

Hyperion: Dingoes are vicious animals

Izzy: Yeah, but they are sooooo cute.

Hyperion: This explains your taste in men

Izzy: Shut up! (hits me)

#3 Italy

Izzy: Because they make all the good food

#2 China

Hyperion: I thought you hated all things Asian

Izzy: No way! I only hate one Asian, and that's because he's a terror. (The night-time cook is a rough customer)

Hyperion: Why China?

Izzy: Because I like Hong Kong. They ran out of room so they made an island for their airport.

Hyperion: Hong Kong is an island.

Izzy: Yeah, but they built a man-made island, just for the airport.

[At this point, we should have been up to #3]

Hyperion: What else?

Izzy: I can't think of any. You asked me at the worst time. You have no idea how draining it is t work here. It just sucks all the ability out of me.

Hyperion: Okay: What's your very favorite country in the world?

Izzy: Uhhhhhhh….Oh, I got it!

#1 The Netherlands

Hyperion: Why on Earth?

Izzy: Because they have so many names…and you can do a lot of drugs…that's probably why they have so many names. You're not going to put that, are you?

Hyperion: Of course not, Izzy. We'll just keep that between you and me.

Izzy: Good. I'd hate for people to think I'm just some spazz who likes drugs.

Hyperion: I'd worry more that people might think you hate everyone. What about South America?

Izzy: I don't like any countries in South America.

Hyperion: Did you have a bad experience with a "Pedro"?

Izzy: (laughing) No, all good experiences, they're (South America) just not my favorite countries. I don't dislike them…

Hyperion: What about Africa?

Izzy: I've never been there. I don't know enough about them to say.

Hyperion: What about Canada?

Izzy: (voice low, to make sure no one around hears) Not the biggest fan

There you have it